Okay, I'm updating because I reached home early, and I don't want to sleep just yet. Okay I screwed my malay. Yeah, I was over-confident that I actually thought I could manage just well without going to intensive. big deal ! I've done it, and I'll receive my own punishment for that. I'm going to re-take it , anyway. THERE, I said my statement with dignity, damn it. Yes, June intensive has started since yesterday. and God, I really really learnt something today. Alright. that's all, nothing much really. I don't take small things as something.

That's pretty much it, know. You're given once chance, and people say " Do it once and do it well ". You don't get privileges down here. Not even when you have big bucks in your big pockets. We struggle to get through the day just the same. Don't speak like as though You're the human God hates the most. That's it, I don't have time for another failure, thank you.

Later

Okay.

1. remaja ( done , hopefully)
2. karangans ( read )
3. God's blessing ( gotten )
4. people's wishes ( gotten )

Now. In the name of the father and the son and the Holy Spirit. ( I wanna Go and sleep. please please please. Gimme all the power I'll need to do my paper tomorrow ) AMEN.

Im nervous

Hello. Morning morning :D

Okay. Dinner with gfs and a family is soooooooooooooooooo much fun, thank you.
Karaoke was unbeatable, too !
Okay, now I miss miss my family.

Right, I'll go and study like crazy, now. bye .

:D

Argh, crap. I have lost my mind. Meet-the-prantes day, today. Let's look back at this and hopefully, I'll go like " what the fuck was I doing ?" :/

English
From E8 to C6
Yeah, slight imrpovement. Damn, I really have to buck up on my language ! What is this, man. I didn't get such results when I was sec 3. Maybe I should really get a boyfriend so I'll be all emotional and just decided to read books . Argh, crap

Malay
C5 to A2
As beejay said, " so? You didn't beat the hobbit, you didn't get A1, why should I be proud of you ? " . Shut up lah bee, At least, it's just .5% away from A1 , damn it. Argh. Hope I'll do well for my O. like pretty pretty please, lah. At least I need something that could make me walk around with some dignity left :/

Amaths
C5 to F9
Great Lupita * clap*. Doesn't it feel soooooo great to fail ?

Maths
1 to 3

Science
1 to 2

Humans
2 to 6
awwwwwwwwww. you smart-ass !

POA
3 to 8
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ! great , now she's going to call me a bimbo again.

Isn't life just so great ? I have 36 points all in total. Great , that's like 10 points away from last term, damn it. Dont say " it's alright, at least you've tried your best ". Damn you people, it's insulting really. This , this is so not my best lah. It's merely half of my best, its just good , not best . I flunked papers, that's not even good, that's bad. Okay.Whatever. I'm screwed. Nothing's gonna change that.
I'll just eat dinner with gfs

later

First of all, Pardon for previous post, I think I'll just delete it. I sounded like a really terrible bitch. haha

Second of all, yes, I skipped today's and will be skipping tomorrow, too.I'll just send my guardian there. It's meet-the-parents day anyway, not meet-the-parents-and-students day.

Thirdly ( okay , now Im getting bored with these positions ). My dresses are all here ! :D, well except for one, of course. Oh well, hope it arrives soon, it's getting on my nerves.

Finally I've finished summarizing an essay about teenagers nowadays, it's just 3.5 pages long. Oh well. Oh, carribean after O ! like straight ! haha. either way, I'm still going to spend time with gfs, so yeah, it will be fun one way or another !

oh yeah, I wanna run with my dad, or small bro, or my mum or my sis ! heh
Family photo, too !

Yeh, that's all. I'm going to go back to my essays ! :D
& oh, newcastle is so stupid like crazy

Here is something for you to mourn about :D

yes I know, my thighs look scary, but whatever

Phew. Intensive was okay like crazy today. Except for the ( literally) neck-breaking task, yeh, it's fine. Ah two more intensive to go, yes yes yes ( and yes two, I'm having one on friday :/ ). And then, that is it man.I'm gonna take my malay paper and, God I'm so not gonna do any more karangan about remaja, haha, that if I do good. You know, my malay teacher is not bad at all. No, he's just, well what you call that. Putting up a brave front, a fierce front. I could see him behaving like any one of us. Oh, I miss Hailey & Dionne & the rest of 4ecs. It feels like it has been a damn long time. Oh well. After O, after O. haha. Can't wait for carribean. & & I want to go Holland V ! Oh, where are my dresses ?? :/

You know, I have a lot , and I mean a lot , of bags.
Argh crap.
But sadly nothing goes quite like this


Fucken it, don't you think ? argh, I want that. It suits me better lah bhetch.
Okay, I'm so doomed
Right, gonna go intensive , now.

later

Intensive was alright, today. I just have to keep an open mind and see things from the fun side, and ta - da. heh. seatmate didn't come today, groan. It didnt really make a difference. but hell, I like him to mark my works. haha. Interclass today. shall keep comments to myself. It's not like I got turned on like crazy, or something like that. I mean, it's not basketball. Great, I'm stereotyping things now. But anyway, yes. Booooooo ! It's just, o.5 % away from a one. dang man, dang. But I thought I was gonna fail my oral like crazy, I mean, I didn't even do well from my point of view. Oh well. Anyway, O LEVEL IS JUST A WEEK AWAY !! Shit man. I'm so gonna call people the night before it. Hope I could do well like crazy eh, so I don't have to retake it. Oh, my mother still keeps my bro sec 4 worksheets, so yayness ! It's sad really, knowing that no one keeps their malay thing. well. God, I can't believe it's just .5 away from beating that hobit ( Dang, I sounded full of jealousy :/). Damn damn damn damn damn. Anyway. argh gee, I'm gonna study malay, again later after this. right 9 more mins. After malay, there will be CARRIBEAN ! yes people, yes. a dionnepitadilahailey day ! haha.

Here goes my wishlist of the moment :
1. Done well for my O !
2. watch carribean
3. wear loose pants, so loose that I could wear my spongebob boxer. haha.
4. My jumper and 2 dresses to arrive ! ( I lied to the girl that I want to use it for a date so I ast her to send it though I still have yet to transfer another 1.20 - dang, there's no more generous people these days - )

right. later

OH . MY BRO GOT ADMITTED TO NEWCASTLE ! :D weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

Oh, I've thought about the best, perfectest most enjoyable date.

1. Perfect companion, of course
2. Best movie of the month
3. a bouquet of flower
4. wanton noodle, or satay, or roasted chicken rice with egg
5. green tea
6. ben & jerry's chubby hubby

HAH. eat that !

OH !
damn. Life is great, really.
I've finished 4 of my karangan already, in like 4 hrs at one sitting. Thanks to the companion ! cheers to you :D
& God, talking on the phone with my family is fun. My lil bro is so funny lah. My mum said He cycled yesterday for God knows how long, and He lost a kg, and so to celebrate, they ordered food ( like how always ) and He gained 2 kgs after that. God, they are so cute. My mummy is alright now ! yay.
Blades of glory was hillarious too. My mate is so great ! heh.
right, I'm gonna drop off at the nearest provision shop, buy some milk, cereal, bread and of course, GREEN TEA ! yay.
naaaaawwwwwww. intensive tomorrow ! Right let's all go through it like a brave daring man

later then

Okay, I'm going to do this quick enough for me to get back to my bro's books by 11.
Okay, I don't have the motivation laaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh. Like, damn it. where'd you go motivation ? where where ? You can't leave me hanging when my O' is just 10 days away. NO NO NO. I thought about things yesterday. Yes, I might I say that I study for my own pleasure, nothing more. But if you peel off the skin and dive your way in, it's definetely more than that, it even made up 3/4 of the reason I study. It's merely because I have to be the best, or closest to the best I could get. Not because of my ego or anything like that, but I wanted to impress my parents. Yes. But now, now that ' love you' can be just spread like that. I don't feel the need to impress that, but more to , not disappointing them. Yes yes. Now , I don't even want to go around looking for a pair of warm arms to fall into. I have my girlfriends, which is more than I bargained for. My family is so much love. Trust me, when you're in my condition. You would give up all the pretty clothes for the world. You would even want to give up Eminem, furthermore some stinky ass who you have to spend time with when matter of fact, God, he's far from equal to your previous. haha. Yes, okay then. 4 more mins to 11, but I'll just go now.

ta - ta

To run is freaking great, man.
Okay, tomorrow. 5 karangan at one go.
& that mountain of unironed clothes in my then-room. It's all folded now, & neatly stacked. thanks credited to akong. the undoable for me was done by him. haha. right.
later.

I'm back yoll, so let me hit it.

Argh, yes, my internet's got cut again. It's all well though, for now at least. Okay, so.. yes, I did not attend school today for I had no mood to. I mean, c'mon. Malay intensive for the whole of next week, well excluding friday because it's meet-the-parents day ! yay. so I screwed my mid-year, it's confirmed. I flunked POA & Amaths, like terribly. I don't feel dejected or sad, or whatever. I mean, why should I pass if the amount of effort I put it in was like this [ ] much. That's really okay , anyway. I promised, I swore , with my own breath and voice, I said to my mummy that I'm. gonna do. soooo much better for the next test. speakin a that . she was sick ! like, on her birthday? Yes yes okay okay. I'm gonna brood in my room doing God knows what.

toodles.

Mid Year is over, and surprise. I screwed up big time. I shall see you guys in extended srps aye. (:


I ran, yea, I did.
I shopped, yes as hell, I did.
I'm a bimbo, now, yes I am.
rarrrrrrh.
I want to watch spiderman 3.
& caribbean.

a day with sugars gave you a reason to live.

Malay paper was madness. Karangan & Dialog, and Paper 2. I never could spend more than 30 mins to do that, it's always so boring. Oh well, let's just hope it will turn out good aye. I mean, for the anxiety induced by this yesterday's night, it worths an A . haha. I wish.

So school without Hailey & Dionne is a no spirit-booster ! I had to bring my mp3 along just to get rid of the butterflies. Loud music is calming. Anyway, spend most of the day with Indonesian embassy members (bleah).

I love love love my family, now. Really do.
Yes yes. tutor come faster then we could do the right thurr.

God, it's sunday already. Time is selfish, don't you think ? It never adjusts, never, itself to our needs. It's like the length of the time we are given is always shorter than what we need, and it takes things away. Anyway, I shall stop already , I still have physics to cover. chem is a , a, a, a... a gone case. yes. haha. Oh, I can't wait for my sister to arrive and live with me ! Oh, God, I'm psyched. Finally , a real proper human to live with XD. and, I'm proud of my parents, oh yes, I am.


Dude, we are not even thisclose.

It's official now, isn't it. Mid-year examination starts tomorrow, yes tomorrow, third of May 2007. I'm not ready, no I ain't. I'm not ready to take mid-year papers, let alone O level. I'm not ready to leave Serangoon sec, that is if I could graduate. God, I am so not ready to leave. Maybe , without realising it, the next time I take 136 to there, it's the day I'm gonna take my O' level results. This is so not fair. Just when I've started to like school, time is going to take it away. I will miss this. I will miss every single thing of each and every one of my classmate's habits that I know, yes, by heart. KKRYAAAISSS ! what the hell could I hold on to if you're gonna take it all away anyway.

Then again, it's just part of life, isn't it.
I don't want to grow old.
Well. GOOD LUCK !

I can't believe this. Without even realising it, noticing it, feeling it. I have became someone who I loathe, who makes me sick to my stomach. Why ? gees, I don't know, really I don't. It just sounds fun, feels fun, is fun. Syke. ugh, I disgust myself. what goes around, comes around eh. I didn't mean to make you as someone who I only picked up and use you to my disposal. No, you ain't. I didn't even pick you up. You've been there, you're there. You're just unlucky enough that I eyed you. God, I'm sorry. really am.

That's it. Let's start afresh. Hey, the name is lupita. Nice to meet you, thank you. I'm just gonna chill as of from now. Thank You. and, good night.

Yes. if I have to choose. no no no. If you ask me, who would I choose : Eminem, or friends ?

well. in italic bold enlarged underlined friends that is.
Yes. I love my friends more than I love Eminem. You can't even equate him and them.

well, maybe you could put it in the same line , what could I say, it's eminem XD